please. tell me to stop eating out of the trash.
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
Dude... You bled on his hand... At this point it doesn't matter that you called him your exes name, seriously.
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Notice: I will be intoxicated and in your area this evening. To unsubscribe from my sexual solicitation list, reply 'fuck off'.
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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