Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Is it because I queefed?
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
im failing my bio class b/c he booty calls me wednesday nights at 6 like clockwork
Tonight will be judged a success if I walk out without having thrown up on my shirt.
Or I could just give you a blow job and make it up to you.
No, that's okay. Don't worry about it.
Going once.....twice.........sold to the girl who didn't really wanna do it anyway.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I swear the crows are laughing at me.
You my friend are stoned into submission
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I apparently got up in the middle of the night after fucking him and started looking for you under piles of his clothing
Randomize
