Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
He sat on a barstool and did the robot for 3 hours - I'm pretty sure he enjoyed himself.
He literally had no idea who I was, so he made me turn around 360 degrees and when he saw my ass, he blurted out my first AND last name.
When she showed me how she could touch her toes without bending her knees, suddenly her face didn't worry me quite as much.
those 9 inches of man changed my life forever.
I'll check it out in the morning. Tonight has been reserved for getting baked and covering myself in kittens because THAT IS AN OPTION.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
He licked my mouth. I felt like I was making out with my dog.
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Randomize
