i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Its 6am and I'm sitting on the couch watching Clifford. Crying into my risotto because emily elizabeth helped the girl in the wheelchair get over her stagefright so she can win a trophy. Never drinking alone again.
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
He corrected my use of grammar... I think we both know that means i have to sleep with him
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Trust no bitch in laser tag. Not a single one.
Bed, food, and you got really nice boobs. That's it really. Foundations of friendship right there.
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
Randomize
