just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I was like, booze is the closest thing I have to a father. Don't pour daddy down the sink
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
If there's one thing I think I could really excel it, it's curating a midlife crisis
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