I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
when the lights went off, all i could see was the glowing of the camera light in the closet... i got the fuck out of there so fast.
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
And when I say "complete whore" I mean I could possibly make a shameful profit by wearing this.
Just sold a bike on craig's list for 4 four lokos and a 40. How bad do you miss college?
You kept throwing bottles at the dorm across the courtyard and when anyone told you to stop you just said "who are you? Al Gore?"
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
You told me you loved me after I brushed your teeth with my index finger.
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
Actually it's really just going to be me drunk in your living room swinging from a pole on a tuesday morning.
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I'm a great relationship counselor. My vagina will let you know if your relationship is gonna work or not.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
When you called me I said did you make it home. You said yeah. Then you said you didn't know where you were. I said you were at home and you said but where. I said you are in the bathroom. Then you said oh, you're so smart lol
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