im just gonna turn drinking alone on new years into a tradition
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
I gave the naked guy in the hotel hall a pop tart. He stopped crying.
Idk, it's Grover wearing a sombrero. Do I need a reason?
We had to coat check the pizza.
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
I'm smoking a bowl and pondering why we haven't discovered teleportation again.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
You have amazing self restraint. If there was one thing I could learn from you, that wouldn't be it. I love my life as it is.
Last night I went outside to our neighbors and asked them to put in money with me to get a hot tub for our patio. Niceeeee
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
I literally have a pirate chest of slutty clothing.
A drag queen just ate a dollar out of my ass. I don't know which one of us has hit rock bottom
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
