Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
I DONT HAVE A FUCKING JOB RIGHT NOW. DO YOU THINK I HAVE TIME TO WASTE GOING BACK AND FORTH WITH SOMEONE WHOS LYING, ABOUT LYING, AND JUST BEING A LIAR? HONESTLY, YES I DO HAVE TIME. BUT I HAVE A FUCKING LOT BETTER THINGS I COULD BE WASTING MY TIME DOING. LIKE ORGANIZING MY POKEMON CARD COLLECTION.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
