I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
We dont have to go to dinner or anything gay like that. I just wanna do it.
I absolutely love you.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
he doesn't care that i have a boyfriend so why should i?
logic in its finest
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
I can't even look at my running shoes. I swear I drank more in the last 2 days than the last 6 months combined
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
Randomize
