She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Yea, she's 42 I'm 23. Girls our age are terrible. All they need is a divorce and a bottle of wine
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
I'm in a corner eating carrots and drinking champagne. I've hit a new kind of low.
How is that low? I love carrots.
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
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