billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You were in the bathroom for two hours practicing "Revenge Faces".
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
This girl in the gym has an amazing body...too bad there's no workout routine for a face.
beeferoni + vodka = puke stuck in braces.
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
just when i thought we would make it home without incident he tried to walk a police dog
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
And THIS is why we get drunk. No good story, documentation, or event happens by eating a salad. Alcohol consumption leads to good things
Just got a Snapchat of his dick with the caption 'We miss you.'
That's true love, there.
On the flip side, we did almost have sex wearing a gorilla mask and deer antlers.............
Randomize
