do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
I woke up with a black eye and a buttplug...not sure I really want to know what happened.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
I am really drunk and also a zombie.
Randomize
