I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
All i remember as you were making ramen is that you kept slurring "i like you as a color"...
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
I wish I cared about making my vagina as presentable as you do.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
I think my FWB just broke up with me and i don't know how I feel about that
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
