You were face down, at your computer, surrounded by beer bottles listening a bagpipes version of amazing grace.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
of course not. I do my best teaching on a hungover monday. I did the research. im still okay with the direction in which my life is headed.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
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