I'm afraid my bank account can't handle syllabus week.
his mom and I have the same butterfly tramp stamp. don't ask how that came up
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Do you remember trying to use a pencil, pen, and sunglasses as your second form of ID at the bar when they wouldn't let you in last night?
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Side note, i did some manscaping and now my farts sound way different
he threw his shirt and suit jacket out the window of the uber going home
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
It does not feel like it was just this morning that I had a penis in multiple cavities of my body
Randomize
