so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
So she stayed over last night and slept walked in to my moms room where she used the bathroom and then proceeded to get in bed with my moms naked boyfriend. So yeah, at least now my family got to meet her.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
I opened my door to go to class and all there was was a raccoon puking on the doorstep. In hindsight, it was a very accurate omen.
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
He had a shameless baby voice when he was talking to my dog. There's no way I'm making it through the night with my clothes on.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
it's always good to have a friend that's a hairdresser, a massage therapist, maybe throw in a lawyer just in case, and always have a friend on food stamps
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
I don't suppose you have a recipe for a cocktail made of bitter resignation, regretting everything, poor life descisions and deep-seated self-loathing?
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
I'm licking blood from my knuckles and I still haven't found my car keys..are you in town tonight?
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
Randomize
