She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
she kept checking the clock when she was giving me head and at midnight she said she had to stop because she cant eat meat on fridays is that bitch serious
All we did was argue about ponys and drug dealers
Can you confirm that Victor fucked a girl for Jack in the Box tacos?
I cannot, but I know he fucked a girl for a Nerf hoop and a "Kingpin" dvd.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
there's nothing like the elf drinking game to get me in the christmas spirit.
Less talking, more tequila
I tried to discuss modern art with a cab driver after explaining that I only had one shoe on b/c a pitbull ate the other one. Wtf. Call me when you can.
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
You were trust falling into bushes
I was so high I could TASTE the fillings in my teeth
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
