what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I woke up using a pile of socks as a pillow. I think theyre clean so thats a plus.
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
I just imagined you going baby-crazy and trying to shove him up into your uterus. Yes, I'm aware he's 7 years old.
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
I'm not complaining, but why is it that every time I hang out with you I come home with random injuries and random girls?
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize
