You just made me feel so damn special
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
If you hear screaming in the middle of the night, bat got loose. Call poison control immediately and explain rabies
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
does doing it on an automatic sink count as shower sex?
You have mono. It's like being pregnant, your are excused from normal social niceties like responding to people.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
Randomize
