So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
i will pay you if you can come get me. he just suggested that we would have a hockey themed wedding.
Just went through ex bf's and hook up buddys and liked pictures of them on facebook. A friendly reminder that I will be back in for the holidays
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
In mid-threesome, need more condoms. Wearing a sheet to the gas station. I'll keep you posted
it is a toga and you are a goddess.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I'm not gonna ask the guy I've fucked like 3 times if he is insecure about his eyebrows.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
