I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Are you still goin to the xmas party?
Yaaaa why?
Jus making sure i will have nice people i know to put a blanket over me when i pass out in the field .
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
Randomize
