If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
I'm about two and a half drinks away from gay.
I'm coming over.
there is nothing more satisfying than playing sudoku while pooping
i think she is mad at you for trying to take a shit in the back seat of her car
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
Sorry I didn't text you for coffee this morning...bad life decision Saturday sorta rolled into Monday...
I'm drunk at McDonald's in a fairy costume at 10 am nearly two weeks after Halloween. I don't think the Ohio State fans get it.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
You ninja crawled over five sleeping guys to get in my room at 6 in the morning to wake me up for sex
...and I think that may just be my favorite moment in our fuckbuddyship
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
Tell him to put up or shut up. Can't be dangling dick in front of ho's without delivering.
It's just disrespectful
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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