I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
I'm glad girls dont get visible erections
But, it would have made life so much easier...
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
i woke up to my roommate spraying cooking spray on my legs. fourth time this has happened. not cool.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
These people keep looking at me like I'm the first person to ever eat ribs in a Home Depot.
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I told him I want him to read me my Miranda rights while he's fucking me. Act exactly like he does while he's on duty except with his dick out.
Randomize
