Why the fuck do they always fuck on couches in porn?
Don't ever text me while you're jacking off. EVER.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Man...I want to get monumentally fucked tonight.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
his penis was like the majestic horn of a unicorn and I came like a million trumpeting rainbows.
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
