I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
Anne I just took two ambiens. I think my body is melting into my blow up bed. Like a stick of butter just slowly melting. And I'm alright. Don't be afraid. I'll be alright.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
Ya he's alive. Apparently he's been drinking Naty and listening to Unbreak My Heart on repeat all day.
Also they do not have any come back to america, i miss my fuck buddy cards at Hallmark.
do you want me to tag you in the pics from the party?
Hmm. Use your judgment. Bootlicking pics are probably not ok. Otherwise fine.
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
My tub is filled with twinkies which would be awesome if they were still wrapped and not floating in a mixture of bath water and what appears to be vomit.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Randomize
