READY
for what?
TO HAVE SEXXXX
i think you have the wrong number
I think i found my new favorite workout. Go to a party where you dont know anybody and constantly walk around the house so you dont look awkward standing alone. im up to 1.8 miles
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Technically my penis started a fight tonight
I told her I didn't have a condom. She then sized me with her thumb and finger and tossed me a large. Then I asked her to marry me.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
I like to make sure they know it's casual by giving then a high five after sex
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
