this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
I told her I had the flu when in reality I did way too many drugs last night, haven't slept and don't want to sit through a 3 hour buisness meeting trying to figure out which voices are real and which are in my head
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Jared is "trying to bite a strangers hat off" drunk. Oh, and that stranger is a girl at a table of 5 guys, one girl.
he busted into the room with single cheese slices and started yelling "THROW SOME CHEESE ON THAT BITCH"
Lest we forget our veterans. Also that two years ago I lost my virginity on this day in a hot tub. Go me for being the worst person on earth.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Vodka and Jamison is not a mixed drink
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
I just want to see his penis in the light. Is that a crime?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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