I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
You NEED to fuck him he's a doctor with one leg. Are you kidding me right now. This will definitely make the list. Plus he buys all of us drinks.
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
I woke up to find a bottle of Bacardi in my shower rack. How was your night?
I thought i didnt really feel whatever i snorted last night until i just realized i think i asked this dude to punch me fight club style
All my friends are going on vacations with their boyfriends while I’m over here in court trying to get a restraining order against my ex....
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
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