is your mom at the bar?
Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
Dnt forget 40 tuesday,dress nice! Like job interview nice, like funeral nice, like a couple muhfuckas sittin on their lawn drinkin forties on a tuesday nice!
we've decided whoever is stupid enough to use the condom that's tacked to the wall deserves to get pregnant.
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
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