Awesome. Ask her out.
Nope. She's got a detail of ed hardy security around her.
Apparently I signed "I love you" on my bar tab last night.
He came on my face and told me I looked like a gingerbread house.
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
Just me. You're probably having sex with her right now, so here's a reminder that you should be thinking of me per our agreement.
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
Let's just say I've never been so continually aware of my nipples before.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I tried to order dominos and couldn't but I accidentally placed an order for this morning. I knew I did it last night and was gonna call and cancel this morning but honestly it's coming in 30 minutes and I need it
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Randomize
