We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
He tried to write down the address for the cab on half a bagel.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
nm just hungover. watching movies and roasting marshmallows in bed, over a candle to avoid life
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
This year my vagina is giving thanks that several of my cubs are coming home for the holiday
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
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