Is it wrong to scream your own name when about to bust?
so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
I just got while a charlie horse while orgasming...most confusing feeling ever...
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
This whole Rob and Chyna drama is giving me trust issues. I'm about to text my ex and be like if you haven't already deleted my nudes, can you?
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
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