Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
sorry for allegedly lighting the beer pong balls of fire
Your panties and toothbrush are in your mailbox. just not ready to be with anyone serious. take care.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
My phone autocorrects "pooping" to "popping" and I'm like DO YOU EVEN KNOW ME??!
I gave him a BJ and he left. Coincidentally that's the name of my memoir.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
