Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
You tired to make Beefaroni in the Mr. Coffee machine.
Seriously.......what do you have to do to get arrested in Vegas???
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
But break dance skills will only take you so far
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
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