never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Okay, good. And if you have one of those portable strip poles that would be nice too.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
ASS. GYMANSTICS. OLYMPICS. NOW!!!
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
We just don't discuss our relationships. It's pretty much like we're single no matter what to each other. And I'm okay with that. ¯\\(ツ)/¯
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
Started my day with puking in a trash can.... Its gonna be a beautiful day
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Remind me to never do anything where hiding something in my butt is the best course of action
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
Randomize
