i'm wearing my white shorts to coax my period out of hiding.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I wake up every morning and wish that I didn't have to wear a bra
I had forgotten what it was like to go to all four classes. It's exhausting.
I'm graduating. Then you'll never see me again.
We better fuck soon then
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
The woman at the nail salon waxing my lip just showed me the strip with all the hair on it while smirking. Apparenltly 'you have a stache' can be communicated through a language barrier.
And next time please put a text between discussing my orgasms and discussing your son - that was weird.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Just found weed in an empty handle. Who knew Capitan Morgan was also a gardener?
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
I'm drinking with a guy who apparently blew my dog sitter.
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Randomize
