too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
yup, got lost on my way to the final. maybe i should have gone to this class all semester
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
just did awkward shuffle by the bagels in the dining hall at 7:30 AM with a kid i've hooked up with. goodbye freshman year.
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
i wish the dell website had a "did you drink an entire bottle of rum and stepped on your laptop which shattered the screen this weekend and would like to know how to fix it without your parents finding out FAST?" link on their homepage.. i can't be the only one
"I'm gonna wax that ass" was the successful pick up line used on me last night. Clearly I had a few too many cause it worked..
He showed me a picture of his baby hamsters and I called them "Mammal McNuggets"
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
How bout we save the 40s for when we FINISH the project this time..
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
Fuck it, I work hard. I deserve nice sex toys
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
