my elementary bus driver served me drinks last night. He hooked me up
did you know they have Ed Hardy school supplies at Target? it's like folders and notebooks for little douchebags in training.
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
oh you can't commit, don't have any real ambitions, and love to drink PBR? well.... sign me up!
Randomize
