I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
We did like every position then did it again this morning. Something about him being the little boy i used to make sand castles with just made it way hotter.
well done
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
Whenever someone from high school gets pregnant or has a pregnancy scare my self esteem grows a good 5 points
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
You gave me balls I gave you half a boob. Fair trade
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I don't think I bit anyone but I woke up to scrapes knees, bruises and new friends.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
There's a dryer on fire at the laundromat, and everyone's just standing around taking pictures. Except me. I'm texting.
Randomize
