Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Had to use Google translator to be able to tell the cleaning lady not to throw away the condoms we have strategically placed throughout the house.
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
why is there cat hair all over my deoderant?
she wanted to smell more freshershest than you.
normally i wouldnt have blown him but he was on dawsons creek.. i love dawsons creek.
Well I scaled a 3 story building last night to get laid. What have u done for ur penis lately?
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
Lying on this bed is like lying on love and marshmallows and joy
On a not really funny at all but kinda brighter note I've gotten really good at texting in hand cuffs
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
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