dont quote avril lavinge. im to drunk.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
Dude feel your hair right now it feels so weird like pasta
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
we need to find an occasion to wear tutus
she broke up with me the week she got divorced. maybe I should grab a beer with her ex
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
