Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
The best part was that when i tried to chase her she ran off in one of those barbie motorized jeeps that little kids use and i chased her on a big wheel, thru lincoln terrace
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
If I don't answer right away it's because I took an Adderall and the fridge needs cleaned.
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
Drinking at 10 in the morning and swimming might not be the best idea I've ever had but it beats working
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