we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
PA to anyone at the party last night and wondering where your pants are: they are in my backyard.
Do you still speak french? one of two girls I woke up with only speaks french...
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
Bahahah I should. I’m the free range drunk girl who should clearly not be free range because who knows what kind of fuckery I would get into
Randomize
