All I remember is drinking vodka out of tupperware.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
Tell nick i'm sorry for throwing a block of cheese at him last night
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
All I I know is that there's 2 new contacts in my phone. Drunk Backdoor and Gayass Handshake. Thanks, Jameson.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
How do I respond to this?! It's not easy to say "you're hot & the sex was good, but outside the bedroom you scare me"
Well that's my green light to bang ur brother. Its not real til its on fb
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
She was doing hand motions and used straws from drinks like those airport light batons to have me back my "747 jumbo dick" towards you.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
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