you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
It's blow job season.
After arriving 30 minutes late, he slowly walked to his desk and halfway there he just falls over like a tree and passes out. I now have some sort of proof as to how awesome that night was.
Well he's a 33 year old furniture salesman that picked up at 19 year old buying a bedroom set for her room. I can see how that would be awkward
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I don't care how hot she was. She didn't like Scooby Doo and I don't fuck with that.
I woke up with my my shoes on and pants half way off and missing 60 dollars. Please please please tell me you saw me last night.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
He made me promise not to describe his penis in detail to you....oops.
Randomize
