drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
There's trophy wives that arent even in the 5th grade yet
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
He offered me a ride home but i walked. He lives by an elementary school so a 10 yr old safety officer helped me across the street during my walk of shame
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
she fascinated with the iron the back of the toilet seat. she made me sit in the bathroom with her for a solid 10 minutes while she just stared and laughed at it
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I kept my extra Molly pill in my wallet in the change part, that's also where I keep my body jewelry while I'm working. The nose ring punctured the pill essentially coating itself in MDMA. My nose ring is back in my nose. This could be entertaining
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize