sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
did you dip my ponytail in franzia? its the only thing i can think of to explain my hair right now.
I just can't promise there won't be a reason to hit you in the face with a dildo again in the future.
Reached a new low last night. Passed out. With my pants down. On the toilet. At ihop. Waitress had to wake me up.
That super awesome moment when the guy who threw up in your bed last night crawls into your roommate's bed the next morning...Naked...She was in it.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
just so you know. the medical term for period cramps is mettelschmerz.
glad to know something that causes such misery in my life has such a laughable name.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize
