So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
I just saw a midget ride by on a scooter...wearing a bowtie and a helmet. My life is complete.
Theres also beggin' strips and a dog bone in the corner...nooo signs of there being a dog though.
I should go buy the economy size box of condoms and sprinkle a path like rose petals to my bed... Think he'd get the hint?
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
A man just squeezed past me in a tight space and said, "Excuse us."
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
Not great. "Leave the toilet seat down, it gives me somewhere to rest my face."
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
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