I shaved my legs finally. I am starting to remember what my skin feels like.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
She gave him a lap dance on the glass table. You can guess how that ended
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
Hint of advice dont get with minor league baseball players, you can google their stats but not their stds.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Kegstand on crutches, you need to get on my level.
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
You went home with a man in a loincloth
I just watched him leave in half a loincloth. Don't you just love Halloween???
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
I just wanted to tell you that the German word for "dickhead" can also be translated as "ass violin" and I think that's beautiful.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
He's got the good dick trifecta - flip phone, works outside, bed with no headboard.
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
Did it work?
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