Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
I HAVE PIZZA MONEY AT ALL TIMES IT'S CALL EMERGENCY PLANNING
And I threw up 26 times yesterday. I actually think I threw up a spider too.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I blew a Trump supporter.
That was a beautiful concert to sleep through ...
I know - Don't let me take drugs from strangers anymore
I was just informed that I asked for a glass of wine at the police station
I'm sure it would have gone very well with the cigarette you lit there.
I don't know what else is in your wedding gift, but I just pulled out a pair of handcuffs in front of her grandmother.
Also a whip and a blindfold. Don't be a bitch, enjoy it!
If you wear a peguin suit you MUST send me a picture!!!
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