I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
Yeah but the gay hasidics turned out to actually just be real gay hasidics
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
Carrying your RA back to her room wasn't the conclusion I was expecting for the first thursday back
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
So who won the naked front yard Olympics last night?
Well my tits are spray painted gold & i have what i think r the Olympic rings shaved in my vag !!!!!!!SO its safe to say i won something ....
when seducing a hipster, do you think taking a nude pic on a lomo-camera app would increase my chances? grainy off-colored boobs and telling him how much i like reading salinger?
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
I'm talking to this guy I met online about French toast. I am the oddest fucking combination of hungry and horny. Wtf brain.
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
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